Scientific research says masturbation can help women de-stress. In her own experiment Psych-she writer, Issy Weeks-Hankins put their findings to the test.
It doesn’t matter what you call it. Whether it’s flicking the bean; touching yourself; hitting the kitten; slugging the sister. Studies have shown 91% of women have masturbated at some point in their lives. *note to self don’t google different names for masturbation*
I am happy to say I am part of that 91%. It feels a bit weird typing that sentence out but I genuinely am happy about it. But that wasn’t always the case.
In Year 10, my then boyfriend (who turned out to be a pube of a man) found out from a friend of a friend that I masturbated. He rung me up one evening asking me if it was true and I said: “Yeah, why?”. I genuinely didn’t think there was anything wrong with it. How could something that made you feel so good be seen so bad? He then immediately responded saying he didn’t think I was that type of girl and it was embarrassing I did it at all.
Looking back I don’t know what I replied with. It was probably something much more modest than what I would say today: fuck off.
According to a report by period and ovulation tracker app Flo Health, 25% of UK women aged 18-34 see masturbation as shameful, compared to 15% of those aged between 45 and 55 years old.
Dr Martha Tara Lee, a relationship counsellor, licensed clinical sexologist and author of ‘Love, Sex and everything in between’, believes all women should embrace masturbation. “Encouraging women to masturbate promotes a healthy relationship with their bodies, enhances sexual self-awareness, and fosters a positive attitude towards their own pleasure and sexuality,” she says. “Claiming their bodies and letting go of shame can lead to the strengthening of neural pathways, making orgasms more intense and pleasurable, further enhancing the benefits of self-pleasure.”
If I’m honest after I have ‘slugged the sister’ (ew) I would never think of the bodily benefits apart from the big ‘O’ benefit. I’d more be feeling proper chuffed with myself giving myself a mental high five.
But whether we are aware of it or not science has found a connection between masturbation and destressing.
A study published in April of this year by students at the University of Zurich found a significant relationship between psychological distress and masturbation, particularly clit masturbation.
Women who experienced higher levels of distress, with symptoms relating to depression said they masturbated more frequently, suggesting clitoral stimulation serves as a self-soothing behaviour during times of stress.
Findings also showed women reported feeling feelings of happiness, and relaxation. These women, who took part in the study, viewed masturbation as a form of me-time and selfcare helping them to relax and unwind.
After reading this I was surprised to say the least. Dr Lee insists understanding the benefits of masturbation can normalize and encourage a healthy perspective on female sexuality. “Masturbation allows women to explore their bodies, understand their anatomy, and discover what feels good for them,” says Dr Lee. “It can also help women relieve stress, reduce menstrual cramps”.
“When a woman masturbates, her body releases endorphins which can help reduce stress and promote relaxtion,” adds Dr Lee. “The release of oxytocin and dopamine during orgasm can help regulate cortisol levels, promoting hormonal balance and aiding in better sleep quality.”
The experiment
In the words of Dr Lee if ‘masturbation is not just about physical pleasure but a form of self-care that nurtures emotional well-being and self-acceptance’ I wanted to put it to the test.
For three days (during a pretty stressful week) I aimed to ‘slug the sister’ everyday, recording how I felt before and after to really pin down if it helped me destress or if I should just stick with my evening chamomile tea.
Looking back over the three days I was actually surprised by my (not so scientific) experiment about how I felt from day one to day three. Knowing I was coming how to have some form of me-time was quite comforting and heart-warming. Obviously, moving forward I’m not going to masturbate every day. Who has the time? But knowing I can set time aside each day for some form of me time is a positive step in the right direction.
Even though I appreciate some people don’t want to talk about their masturbation experiences it doesn’t mean others, who do feel comfortable to talk about it, should be judged for talking about the dreaded ‘it’. The more we talk and write about the more the stigma around masturbation will continue. Bring on the big O’s
“Normalizing conversations about female masturbation helps challenge outdated societal norms and beliefs that may have shamed or silenced women’s sexual desires,” said Dr Lee. “By highlighting the physical, emotional, and psychological benefits of masturbation, we empower women to embrace their sexuality, prioritize their pleasure, and advocate for their sexual well-being without shame or judgment.”
Expert insight: Dr Martha Tara Lee
Dr. Martha Tara Lee, D.H.S., M.A., M.A., B.A., is a relationship counsellor and clinical sexologist. She is
AASECT certified sexuality educator and certified sexuality educator supervisor. and author of Love Sex and Everything In Between, Orgasmic Yoga and From Princess to Queen
