As you are transported to the Bridgerton world, decadent balls fill your social calendar, men gracefully request a space on your dance card, and your romantic interests are governed by social expectations and societal norms. If you tried to explain Hinge to someone from the 1800s they would not be able to fathom such scandalous activity and Lady whistledown would have a page or two full of judgement.
With Colin now taking the baton from Anthony and the Duke of Hastings, the Bridgerton 3 magic has got us all wanting to take Penelope Featherington’s place. So, why wouldn’t we want a Bridgerton man as it’s an unanimous understanding that everyone looks better in a suit.
‘‘The fascination comes from the frisson created by the strict boundaries and etiquette that was expected to be adhered to at those times; the piquancy of a glance across a room, a glimpse of an ankle, the slightest passing touch and the fan code that was used to silently communicate,’’ says counsellor and hypnotherapist Susan Leigh. ‘‘Even today many people find it far more sexy and alluring to watch a film where a couple enters the bedroom and the doors close, leaving what follows to the imagination. Boundaries and rules can add to the sexual tension and chemistry.’’
It’s not that we crave the limitations that were often applied to women during this time but dating in the 21st century has no mystery. With the ability to stalk your date: where they went to school, what their first pet was called and even their parents, thanks to Facebook, sometimes it would be nice for the intrigue to last longer than five minutes.
‘‘These social rituals, be it dances or courtship behaviours, impart a structure to human communication that feels closer to an art than a science,’’ says registered clinical counsellor Nilou Esmaeilpour. ‘‘That is quite an invigorating change from the briefer, more casual, and often digital relationships that we have today. ’’
Not to say the Bridgerton men are not deserving of the attention they receive but put any man in a tailor made suit, owner of a vast estate and every sentence, action and advance is done with the utmost chivalry, not many who would decline. So, is it merely the allure of the regency era or are 21st century men really that insufferable?
‘‘It’s the difference from today’s men that’s precisely what can make them so appealing,” says Leigh. ‘‘They are shown as macho, with a rugged, testosterone appeal. There’s no talk of feelings, the roles are clearly defined, with a sense of him being there to ‘take care of everything’ that is detached from our day-to-day lives. It’s completely fuelled by our imaginations. We’re free to fill in the blanks and construct a story that takes us away from our daily lives.’’
We are all guilty of romanticising the subtleties of a Netflix series and the string version of ‘Wildest Dreams’ only heightens that. You’re taken to a world where your fiance suddenly discovers he wants to marry your sister and not you, and the fallout is minimal. Put that situation in the modern world and there would be more than one broken heart, and a few slashed tires.
‘‘An added forbidden love element that Regency romance adds into the mix ensures a lot of viewer engagement and fascination. Stories like that tap into the universal theme of longing for what one can’t have, so every secret meeting and stolen glance is just super-exciting, says Esmaeilpour .’’
It is clear to say that a Bridgeton romance mirrors that of the lifestyle. Dazzling, enchanting, and scandalous, of course. Instead of the sexual tension building as you stare longingly at emotive artwork that Daphne and Simon experienced we get whisked to Nandos as a ‘special’ Friday night date. Bridgerton romances remind us all that the bare minimum will never be enough, so really what’s not to love about being courted by the likes of Colin Bridgerton.
Expert insight: Susan Leigh
Susan Leigh is an author, columnist, counsellor and hypnotherapist with over twenty years experience assisting individual clients, corporate businesses and readers all over the world.
Susan also provides a sensitive, professional and confidential counselling and hypnotherapy service via her practice, Lifestyle Therapy. Her work includes navigating anxiety, stress management and helping couples facilitating better communication.
Expert insight: Nilou Esmaelipour
Nilou Esmaeilpour is the founder of Lotus Therapy, which was created with the vision of helping people heal. She is a Registered Clinical Counsellor and holds a graduate degree in Psychology with a specialisation in women’s issues, relationship issues and self-esteem.
